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Top 5 Pizza Toppings of All Time

Have you ever wondered what the best pizza toppings of all time are? Of course you have. Some people spend hours selecting their toppings with care while others are wary of unfamiliar toppings. These people are fools. Any supreme gentleman knows precisely which toppings are best and why. If you don’t already know then I suggest you read the following article about the Top 5 Pizza Toppings of All Time, then read it a second time and then never mention it to anyone or they may realize that you are a fraud.

1. Cheese

This is a substance made from the fermented secretions of a cow nipple. Sounds gross? Only if you hate freedom like all vegans do. Go back to North Korea commie. There are many cheeses, most of them, like commies, are horrible and French so Its best to think of them in three categories: hard, soft and stringy. Soft cheeses are the most French and don’t belong anywhere near a pizza. You need a bit of hard cheese and a bit of stringy cheese mixed together for a good pizza. There are some pizzas with no cheese like marinara, these can be used as frisbees.

top 5 pizza toppings of all time

2. Tomato

These stop men from getting cancer of the butt. You probably never eat anything healthy so think of this as your annual intake of fruit and vegetables. The vitamins you get from tomato sauce on your pizza are probably the only thing keeping you alive now you disgusting slobs. Tomatoes are acidic so they cut through the fat of the cheese, but they don’t cut through your fat, you need a doctor for that.

3. Salami

Did you know pizza comes from Italy? Well so does salami. Its name comes from sale which means salt because it is a cured salted, fermented hunk of pig meat. Maybe you don’t eat salami for some religious reason, in which case why not ritually slaughter a goat and put that on instead? Pepperoni is a type of salami as far as I am concerned. In fact any sausage made south of the Alps is salami.

4. Anchovies

These taste salty. Some people don’t like them. These are the people whose parents didn’t raise them right. I bet you think food grows on trees? Think you’re too good for anchovies do ya? “but I don’t really like fish” Shut your mouth and eat your food…I realize that is technically impossible but just do it.

top 5 pizza toppings of all time

5. Cheetos

Don’t give me that “Cheetos aren’t Italian.” Let me ask you, who the heck do you think you are? Where do you get off telling me what I can and can’t put on a pizza with your hoity toity, frenchified ideas about what can and can’t be put on a pizza. Cheetos are in the top 5 best pizza toppings of all time! Don’t believe me? Just read this blog again. Cheetos are cheesy and crunchy so they provide both flavor and texture. Only a connoisseur can appreciate their value, the nuanced palette of an American is required to savor such a delicacy so Eurotrash need not apply

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£10 Cashback and 50% off with Dominos Voucher

dominos vouchers

You can get two great deals in one with this awesome Dominos voucher. First off you get £10 cashback for your pizza, which is a huge saving, and secondly, if you go into the Domino’s store to pick up your pizza yourself, then you get 50% off of your order! It’s the best thing since sliced pizza.

 

New Domino’s customers will also earn an exclusive 5% cashback rate on their spend, whilst existing customers will earn 2% cashback.

These tasty Dominos vouchers are valid from Monday 17 August 2015 until Sunday 23 August 2015.

All you have to do is visit the Quidco website and sign up for a free Quidco account. This may sound dodgy but i have tried Quidco and it works fine. They don’t charge you anything, but they track your purchase with a cookie and they get paid by the retailer as an affiliate. The savings are passed on to you, the pizza consumer! You just need to make sure you have cookies enabled in your browser and you sign up to Domino’s after having signed up to Quidco and clicked for the Domino’s voucher. Then the transaction is automatically registered and the money is paid into your account via Paypal.

Easiest way to get £10 off of a half price pizza I have ever heard of! Click here to take advantage of the deal.

 

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5 Reasons Why Pizza is the Best Food Ever

If you visit this blog then I’m preaching to the converted, but everybody needs to know why pizza is the best food in the world.Not only is it delicious but it is also awesome and easy to get and easy to eat. It is ideal for lazy people, and there are lots of those so it is ideal for the 21st century.

 

1. It Contains all the Groups in the Food Pyramid

It has tomatoes (vegetable/fruit) pepperoni (meat) cheese (dairy) and dough (carbs). OK so that’s everything sorted.

why pizza is the best food 1

2. Pizza is Sexy

Danged sexy. Shake it ladies.

why pizza is the best

3. Pizza makes the Perfect Date Food (Just add Netflix)

Literally, the best date is just a movie and some pizza followed by some intimate interaction. Who could refuse such an offer.

why pizza is the best food 3

4.Pizza is Punk Rock

Pizza is punk because anyone can do it. Pizza to the people man. Even Joey Ramone liked pizza (Rest In Pizza)

why pizza is the best food 2

5.Pizza is like a Drug

Be careful son, that stuff packs a wallop. Make sure you don’t get addicted or you’ll be jonesin’ for the cheese everyday

why pizza is the best food 4

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Free Pizza for America from the Drunk British Jesus of Pizzas

free pizza jesus

Daniel Sobey-Harker is being called free pizza jesus after he ordered pizzas for strangers in the US

 

A British man is being hailed on reddit as the Jesus Christ of free pizza after he got drunk and spent $550 on pizzas for complete strangers in the USA. He got loaded on 9 beers and decided to spend his bitcoins on a pizza for an online stranger but ended up buying 30 pizzas instead.

 

He didn’t understand the payment options and ended up buying two bitcoins, which are worth $550. Then he went crazy spending it all on pizza, even sending one free pizza to Hawaii.

His post on reddit said:

 

‘Can someone help me (UK) buy a pizza for someone in the US? I’ll reward whoever can get me a method that works.
‘Are you in the States? Do you want pizza? Talk to me. May have gone overboard with Bitcoins.
‘Like I bought two to make sure it worked and it turned out that’s like $550 [£352]. Gotta be Papa John’s tho as they’re the easiest to sort out (sic).
‘If you want a pizza write in a comment in this thread why you want one. I’m not very eloquent right now but there’s about $160-$170 worth going.’

The next morning he woke up with less money, a hangover and loads of grateful messages.

‘I think I got out about 30 pizzas, and I’ve got 1,200 notifications on my account which will take a while to get through.The lesson here is don’t drink and Reddit, but people seem very happy by it all.’

One of the happy recipients of free pizza wrote the following response.

‘Wow it’s amazing how challenging it is for someone in the UK to order pizza for someone in the US, but it is far more amazing that you have taken it upon yourself to jump through all the hoops to do so.
‘Not only that but instead of getting angry about obtaining a whole $500 in Bitcoin, you make it rain pizza instead!

What a nice guy! He should have bought me one though. This is what I calla good drunk!

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Funny Pizza Memes

Y’all can’t get enough of those internet may may’s amirite? The only thing more satisfying than a juicy pizza meme is an actual pizza. So why not sit back with a cheesy slice of pizza while you peruse the finest pizza themed memes of the interwebs.

If you don’t like pizza or memes then what the heck are you doing here man? This is a post about pizza memes on a pizza themed website. You are well out of your comfort zone now my friend. Best turn back and go home, that’s my advice. For the rest of you, scroll on and feast your eyes on these succulent memes.

 

Let’s start with some food science. This is a very juicy little may may.

pizza memes

How about a bit of scumbag steve? He is an old may may; not at all dank but with an enduring quality.

pizza memes

George Clooney is not a may may but he is a pizza. I consider this meme to be reasonably dank.

 

pizza memes

 

Haha naughty dogoo has stolen the pizza and got stuck in a tree. What a crazy world we live in eh? Come down pupper!

 

pizza memes

 

Naughty cat receives punishment for stealing the pizza. Nice meme my friends.

pizza memes

 

Well, by now are think you are all memed out. No need to overdo it my friends. All things in moderation, that’s what the ancients said. Come back when you are ready for more memes which are themed around popular fast food items of Italian origin and I will rustle up some more dank ol’ memes for you. Farewell!

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